31 Days of Yes: A No that is Actually a YES
I get involved in my children's squabbles too often. I want them to remember that we are a family, and we have got to stick together because that crazy world out there wants to eat us alive. I want to teach them that the only way to show people the love of Jesus is to be different (well, they are "different", but I mean in a remarkable way, not a twitchy way) and treating those who annoy us with love is radical and noteworthy. So I try. Hard. I reason, I explain, I use too many words and they hardly hear me through the red haze and injured pride.
I do think there is a time for teaching, but it's usually not in the heat of battle. I get angry over the interruptions and the screeching, and the fact that no one is even listening to me expound on the virtues of brotherly love, dang it. No one is happy and nothing is gained. So today I am making a conscious effort to say no to squabbles and YES to my sanity. But what does that look like? If the fight is verbal, I walk away, outside to collect my vitamin D if necessary. If it is physical, I put all involved children in the bathroom. It's hard to fight in an enclosed space, and it seems to make them giggle. If the fight is continuous or dangerous (rarely since they are so small), I separate with walls and doors and a timer. No matter the situation, I say yes to my peace by saying no to my own verbal involvement. Judging by the sounds from the other room right now, it appears to be a day that will provide me many opportunities to practice my "yes."
day three
I do think there is a time for teaching, but it's usually not in the heat of battle. I get angry over the interruptions and the screeching, and the fact that no one is even listening to me expound on the virtues of brotherly love, dang it. No one is happy and nothing is gained. So today I am making a conscious effort to say no to squabbles and YES to my sanity. But what does that look like? If the fight is verbal, I walk away, outside to collect my vitamin D if necessary. If it is physical, I put all involved children in the bathroom. It's hard to fight in an enclosed space, and it seems to make them giggle. If the fight is continuous or dangerous (rarely since they are so small), I separate with walls and doors and a timer. No matter the situation, I say yes to my peace by saying no to my own verbal involvement. Judging by the sounds from the other room right now, it appears to be a day that will provide me many opportunities to practice my "yes."
day three
This is the third post in the series 31 Days of Yes. Click here to see a list of all the posts.
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